2 August 2026
Chapter 1: Introductions
They sit at a table having a coffee, briefly getting to know each other.
Oso begins by talking about how well the big project they’re going to work on together needs to go. He states that there’s a lot riding on it.
Frank nods and agrees, he begins talking about the concerning logistical points, which makes Oso uncomfortable.
Oso, deflecting, “So do you have a family?”.
Frank, “Yeah, I do. I’ve been married to my wife for, ooh, 4 years? She’s nice. Do you?”
Oso, “Great. Yes, my partner’s name is Josephine. ” He says her full name with pomp and a smile. “We’re talking about having kids.”
Frank, “Oh how great! How long have you been together?”
Oso, “Nearly a year! I’m not sure about it though.” His smile fades. “There’s some things she does which bother me.”
Frank, with slightly more consideration, “Right… Well what would you like Josie to change? Or rather, what do you wish might change?” Having met Oso this morning, Frank decided it was best to be cautious and not offend. After all, they have a big project together.
Oso, exasperated, “She loves to go for walks without wearing shoes and she never washes her feet. All the rugs need washing now.”
Frank, “Oh no, the rugs! How troubling.” He pauses, considering. “But that’s fine! Are there more things? Are these things that’d need to change before you two got married?”
Oso, “Ah there’d be plenty”.
Frank, “Ok”, nods his head, “Well… how much of her? Like as a percentage?”
Oso, “25% I think.”
Frank, “Wow that’s a lot”.
Oso, “Yeah but I really love her.”
Frank, “And love conquers all.” Frank thinks about what it’d be like to want to replace a quarter of his wife.
Oso, “How about yourself, anything about your partner you’d like to change?”
Frank, “Well we’ve been together now for a while, a lot of the kinks have… Pshhht!” Making a gesture with his hands to show they’d blown away.
Oso, “That’s great! Did it take long? Was it hard?”
Frank, “Yes. We used to fight all the time! Then we figured it out.”
Oso, “So have you got any tips?”
Frank, “I do. So Siobhan and I would do fortnightly sprints with one another. Do you know agile management?” Small shake of the head from Oso.
“Well you come up with things you need to happen, jobs if you will, and break them down into tasks. Then together you assign them to yourself or your partner to do in that fortnight.”
Oso, “Ah, right.”
Frank, “There’s actually this great software, let me get it up.” He pulls out his laptop and flips it open.
He does a little pull at the corner of his mouth in consternation, first the left side then the right as he waits for the screen to load.
“Alright look here.” He flips it around and shows his project board. Several items come to Oso’s attention:
-Remind Frank to close the door (Highlighted yellow) {Easy – Frank}
-Request a shelf in the bathroom cupboard from Siobhan. (Highlighted orange) {Medium – Siobhan}
-Frank to twice daily apply Minoxidil to head for hair regrowth. (Highlighted red) {Hard – Frank}
Frank, “I find it so satisfying. I started it alone when we were dating but Siobhan joins me now. It’s colour coded for how much emotional energy it’s going to take to deal with for us.”
Oso, “Wow this is really something.”
Frank, “Yeah so when I started, there were some things that I knew annoyed me, but I couldn’t change them at the time because, well, you have to choose your battles.”
Oso, “Yes I know you do have to choose your battles.”
Frank, “Right well this helped me choose my battles!”
Oso, “How much do you think you want to change your partner now? Like it looks like there’s a lot here.”
Frank, “Nah these are all small. We used to have Shiobhan to be nice once in a while, that took a long time to get right.”
Oso, “Wow that’s fantastic! Well how about, after we do our business today, can I ask that you help me start this for my relationship?”
Frank, “Sure! We can colour code it however you’d like too if you’re worried about that.”
Oso, “Uhm, no. I’m not worried about that.” He says it with a small smile.
Frank scratches his head for a moment and frowns, “I’d best have another coffee now we’re moving on to business. Want anything?”
Oso, “Latte for me please”. Frank stands and shuffles toward the counter before a quick glance back at his laptop. He steps back and closes it, with a quick reassuring smile to Oso, who stares blankly back.
Frank gets to the counter, “Uh hello, may I have an espresso and a latte please.”
The man at the counter nods his head, “Would you like anything special in the latte?”
Frank, to Oso at the table 3 steps away “Hey Oso, do you want anything special in your latte?”
Oso replies, “Yes please, almond milk please, I’m allergic to dairy.”
Frank, slightly confused, “Uh yeah, latte with almond milk, thanks”.
The man at the counter nods and says “Alright, coming up, I’ll bring it to you.”
Frank points to the eft machine, slightly off balanced, lips slightly pursed, questioningly.
“Pay when you go” the man at the counter says while pouring almond milk in a jug.
Frank sitting back down next to Oso opens his hands on the table and declares “It was lucky he asked if there’s anything special in your latte!”
Oso gives a questioning look and says “How come?”
Frank, “Well it’d have come with milk!”
Oso, “It’s still coming with milk?”
Frank, “No I mean it’d have come with cow’s milk.”
Oso, “How come? Did you ask for cow’s milk?”
Frank, “No but… what? Cow’s milk is the default.”
Oso, giving a warm smile “You’ve lost me.”
Frank, perturbed, flips his hands over so they’re facing down and withdraws them to the edge of the table.
Frank, “Alright so we better get to business.”
Oso, “Lets wait for the coffees. I feel like we’re both a bit off at the moment. If you don’t mind.”
Frank, feeling fine but having offered the coffee order, has a bubble of confusion emerge inside of him, which emerges as a very raised eyebrow.
They both wait in silence for a few moments, Oso with his legs crossed to the side looking very relaxed, crosses his arms and tucks his chin into his neck. Frank is holding his chin and scratching his hair.
The coffee comes and Oso looks up with a warm smile.
“Thank you”, they both say.
The coffee man walks back to his bench and Frank leans across the table.
Frank, “Right so we have 6 months to plan this thing. It’s a cold start in my understanding. I have nothing at this point. No connection, schematics, blueprints, or security system.”
Oso, “Oh well I have a target, we’re robbing the RBA, so we’re not really starting at nothing.” Frank glances sideways at the man behind the counter, and continues to scratch his head and starts to stroke his chin.
Frank, quietly “Great point Oso. That’s true, we’re not starting at nothing.”
Chapter Two: Scoping
Oso looks at his coffee cup deep in thought while Frank is writing in his book. Frank’s filled out and turned over quite a few pages. He looks up at Oso, with his eyebrows drawn together, a look of concentration and concern.
“I think we should go for a walk to discuss”, Frank said to Oso, looking around pointedly. Oso nodded slightly and finished his coffee and stood, ready to leave. They left the café together.
Oso, “I know a park down this way”, Frank obliged happily.
They made their way to a park, sitting on a bench with a wide clearing around them and no people to overhear.
“I think we’ll be ok, but some of this robbery is going to be close to risky. I’ve drawn it up if you want to see.” Frank opens his spiral bound book to the first page where he’s drawn a mind map. Oso looks over.
“So, I’ll just start, let me know if you disagree with any points or if you have a different vision.
I like to treat a robbery in three stages. Scoping, planning, execution.
During scoping we’ll do some planning, during planning we’ll do some execution, but we don’t start executing until we’ve finished scoping.”
Oso’s nodding his head mostly expressionless. “Of course of course.”
Frank takes a moment to feel that this is going well. He had been worried at the café about Oso’s competence. He feels it is very positive that he agreed to leaving the café, and then he recommended the park.
“Great” Frank said with a smile.
He continued, “To discuss scoping then, I’d like to confirm our understandings. We’ll be robbing the Royal Bank of Australia’s gold regardless of logistics, that’s the direction we were given. Is that your understanding too, regardless of the logistics?”
Oso took a short breath, “Yes, that’s my understanding. It appears to me that this is not a job motivated by money. There must be a political aspect, though that is not my prerogative. Therefore I believe to satisfy our client, we should consider the RBA’s gold reserves our only objective, not an easier source of wealth.”
“Great, I agree” Frank said. “You know the gold is stored in England?”
“Yes” Oso confirmed somberly. “Do you believe it will be a problem?”
Frank, “Uh yeah, lots of problems! Did you get a budget?”
Oso smiled “5 million”.
Frank “Me too, this it’s each or together?”
Oso “I hadn’t thought about that.”
Frank “Let’s aim to keep it under 5 million together so we don’t have to bother the client.”
Oso, “Very good.”
